Alphabetical Mathematics

This is neither bookish nor literary, but it’s funny and interesting! 😛 Found it in my inbox a long time ago.

This is strictly from a mathematical viewpoint…

It goes like this:

What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?

Here’s a little mathematical formula that
might help you answer these questions:

If:

A B C D E F G H I J K L M
N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15
16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:
H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

And

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But,

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And,

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

AND, look how far Ass Kissing will take you.

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while Hard Work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it’s the Bullshit and Ass Kissing that will put you over the top.

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. museditions
    Jan 15, 2009 @ 16:01:16

    Certainly a unique perspective. I will start living my life according to this immediately! 😛

    nylusmilk: rotfl! sounds like you’re putting to practice the one that adds up too 103% already. :mrgreen:

    Reply

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