Found this from here. I’ve listed below my favourites. 😀
3. Growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is not “an extra credit project for Herbology”.
8. I will not use Umbridge’s quill to write “I told you I was hardcore”.
9. I will stop referring to showering as “giving Moaning Myrtle an eyeful”.
10. Polishing my wand in the common room is acceptable. “Polishing my wand” in the common room is not.
11. If a classmate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that fact and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.
14. I will not start every Potions class by asking Professor Snape if today’s project is suitable for use as a sexual lubricant.
16. “Springtime for Voldemort” is not an acceptable suggestion for the class play.
17. Seamus Finnegan is not “after me Lucky Charms”.
21. It is exceptionally tasteless to tell Professor Lupin that “Once you go Black, you never go back.”
23. I will not bring a Magic Eight Ball to Divination class.
24. I am not to refer to the Potions classroom as “Kitchen Stadium”.
25. I will not tell Ron and Hermione to “Get a room” whenever they start to fight.
30. Remus Lupin does not want a flea collar.
31. Sirius Black is not #24601.
35. Calling Lucius Malfoy “Luscious Mouthful” is just plain gross.
37. There is no such thing as an Invisibility Thong.
39. Asking “How do you keep a Gryffindor in suspense?” and walking away is only funny the first time.
40. I will not offer to pose nude for Colin Creevey.
41. I will not offer to pose nude for Dean Thomas.
45. I will not offer to prepare tandoori owl.
48. I will not greet Professor McGonagall with “What’s new, pussycat?”
Which is your favourite?