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There was a man from Ghent
Who had a penis so long it bent
It was so much trouble
That he kept it double
And instead of coming he went.
There was a man called Dave
Who kept a dead whore in a cave
He said “I admit
I am a bit of a shit
But think of the money I save”.
There was a lady who triplets begat
Nat, Pat and Tat
It was fun breeding
But trouble feeding
Cause she didn’t have a tit for Tat.
There once was a man named McGill,
Whose acts grew exceedingly ill,
He insisted on habits,
involving white rabbits,
and a bird with a flexible bill.
There once was a man from Bel Air,
Who was doing his girl on the stair.
When the banister broke,
He doubled his stroke,
And finished her off in mid-air.
There once was a man from Madrass
Who’s balls were constructed of brass
When jangled together
They played stormy weather
And lightening shot out of his ass!
There was a young fellow named perkin
Who was always jerkin his gherkin
His father said perkin
Stop jerkin your gherkin
Your gherkins fer ferkin not jerkin
The once was a young girl from Norway
Who hung by her feet from the doorway;
Which worked out quite well,
‘Cause when you rang her bell,
It actually turned out to be foreplay!
There once was a couple named Kelly
who walked around belly to belly
because in their haste they used library paste
instead of petroleum jelly